19990821

after death

my grandfather died.

a bittersweet journey it seems though mayhaps a test as well indeed they are the same and both it must be a passing moment of beginning and decision stretched in time to fill our lives what a strange and wonderful thing it is to simply be and then... what? eternity awaits us it seems but what sort of thing is that another moment perhaps not passing and stretching just simply being unfollowed unchanging and yet still what is its nature pain, joy, or void surely the void is no moment at all and so if there should be a moment beyond that which passes then it must be good or evil but which here in this season of time i have felt both and both are within me it is in the decision that my eternity is chosen but how decided? is it the greater joy or sorrow felt or the greater given i should hope it is the given for it is only ourselves of which we have any control and yet here too our hope fails if the smallest evil given should keep eternal joy at bay for all have evil within i can only then find hope in a Saviour...
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